(NOTE: The first part of the discussion on Ruth can be found here:
http://disciplemakersnc.blogspot.com/2007/10/romancing-ruth-part-1.html )
Okay, so we've seen how godly romance involves imperfect people with needs and how it requires a faithful devotion to God but what does a person with that kind of devotion look like? That is to say, how do they behave in their relationships based on their commitment to God? Well, the answer to that question is found in our next two points...
4. Godly romance requires a woman of godly character.
(Don't worry ladies. The men will get theirs too with the next point. :-) )
As 21st Century American Christians, most of us are sadly just not all that knowledgeable about the Old Testament or the Hebrew roots of our faith. As such, many of us may not even be aware that the ancient Hebrew Bible--while it does contain the same books--is not arranged like our modern Old Testaments. We've seen how Jesus referred to the OT as "the Law [and] the Prophets" (Matt. 5:17). This is actually an abbreviated form of the Hebrew Bible, or the Tanak. The consonants of the word "Tanak" stand for "Torah"--or the Law, "Nebiim"--meaning "prophets"--and "Kethuvim"--meaning "writings." The Law was the five books of Moses, or the Pentateuch (Genesis-Deuteronomy). The prophets included history books as well as the major and minor prophets. The writings included the wisdom literature and the Psalms but also included some of what we consider history books such as Chronicles, Esther and--you guessed it--Ruth. The books in the writings were considered beneficial to memorize and are often recounted at festivals of the Jews, even today (Esther 9:28). (I know this is a little heady but trust me; I'm getting to a point here.)
In the original Hebrew canon, the book of Ruth is located directly following the book of Proverbs a book that ends with a discussion on "an excellent wife" (Prov. 31:10, NASB). The phrase refers to a woman of virtue and is in fact translated "virtuous woman" in some translations. The phrase only appears three times in the Scripture, once more in Proverbs (12:4) and in only one other book--again, you guessed it--Ruth. In Ruth 3:11, Boaz uses this same phrase ("woman of excellence" in NASB) to describe what he knows about Ruth. So consider this: when you read Proverbs and Ruth together in the ancient canonical order, the book of Ruth is introduced with a description of a woman who looks a lot like Ruth. And the book of Ruth serves as a model for the qualities found in the last several verses of Proverbs. You know what that means? That's right! Ruth is the "Proverbs 31 woman" so many books get written about! (Sadly, most of the people writing those books probably don't even realize this or have a clue about the connection between the two books in the older canon.) But, if that's the case, how do the lofty qualities of Proverbs 31 manifest themselves in the life of Ruth? Here are some of her qualities as demonstrated in her story:
a) The godly woman is kind with a servant's heart. (2:1-7, 11-12)
Ruth sees that Naomi was depressed and that they need to eat. So she asks permission to go work and glean in the barley fields for grain for bread (2:2). Naomi apparently hasn't done anything about their situation. She is bitter ("Mara") and seems to have lost all hope. But Ruth wouldn't leave Naomi before and she won't let her starve now. She's going to go and work. The Law allowed for the poor and sojourners in Israel to glean the grain that was dropped during the harvest to provide for their families (Lev. 19:9-10) and so, this is the track Ruth takes to provide for herself and Naomi.
Her kindness to Naomi and her willingness to serve does not go unnoticed. Boaz commends her and treats her very well for it. Apparently, he was attracted to her primarily on the basis of her kind heart (2:5-7, 11). Lots of women are physically desirable outwardly but inwardly are shallow and selfish (sadly, this is often true even with the "spiritual" ones). But a girl with a servant's heart? That's rare. But that's just what a godly man like Boaz is looking for.
b) The godly woman is pure of heart and modest in her behavior. (3:1-7)
When the time comes for Ruth to express her interest to Boaz, Naomi devises a plan that, to our 21st century eyes, seems a little... odd. Looked at from the perspective of our sex-saturated culture, this idea of uncovering Boaz's feet and lying down on the threshing floor before him might even seem a little suspect. But nothing could be further from the truth.
After all, under Hebraic law there was a far easier (albeit far less reputable) way for a single woman to get a man to marry her. She could seduce him. Then, according to Deuteronomy 22:28-29, he would be required to marry her and he could never divorce her, even though divorce was allowed in other cases. Based on Ruth's character as displayed elsewhere, it's not surprising that Naomi does not suggest such a shameful means to "seek security" (3:1) for Ruth. She does however tell Ruth to pretty herself up a little bit (3:3) but, rather than doing so to draw attention to herself and entice Boaz, Naomi instructs her to lie quietly before him--in other words, to make herself available to him rather than to pursue him (and thus usurp his role as the head in the relationship). How she lets Boaz know she is available is our next subpoint on the godly woman...
c) A godly woman is willing to submit to her husband. (3:8-9)
"Oh, no. He's talking about submission. Time to go." Hang on, girls. Submission doesn't have to be a bad thing. In fact, it's the best way a woman can show her love to her husband (and yes, it is commanded by God for wives; Eph. 5:22-24). It's also what, more than almost anything else, makes a man want to love his wife sacrificially, like Christ loved the church (Eph. 5:25; more on that in the next point). That's because men desparately crave respect, especially from the women in their lives. And if submission and respect aren't offered early in the relationship (and--to varying degrees--in other relationships with the men in a woman's life), a woman is not likely to just learn it when she says "I do."
Ruth understands this concept. Having revealed herself to Boaz, she doesn't beg him to marry her and, as we've seen, she doesn't try to seduce him. Instead she asks him, "Spread your covering over your maid" (3:9). The request is a symbolic one. She is asking him to take care of her--to be her provider, her protector, her hero--to spread his cloak over her, as a bird would spread its wing over its chicks to keep them warm and safe. It's an incredibly romantic but entirely pure request. And Boaz responds exactly the way Ruth wants him to. This would be an unbelievably risky thing to do if Boaz were not a man of godly character (which is our fifth point) but, as it is, Ruth reveals strength in her submission to him. Far from losing, she gains exactly what she's looking for: a godly man who can--and does--take very good care of her!
The husband of the Proverbs 31 woman (who would be Boaz based on our little canonical argument above) says of her, "Many daughters have done nobly, But you excel them all" (Prov. 31:29). That sort of nobility doesn't come along every day but it is achievable to the woman who displays godly kindness, modesty and submission as her adornment. And the godly guy who finds a girl like that? Well, he's bound to praise her (and God, since she's a gift from Him--Prov. 18:22) pretty highly and openly, too.
And for more on that godly man, check out the next installment...
Thursday, October 18, 2007
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
Romancing Ruth (part 1)
It may seem a little strange that, in the midst of our study of "The Hard Sayings of Jesus" and specifically Jesus' teaching from the Sermon on the Mount (Matthew 5-7) that we would take that moment to do Disciplemakers' first ever Old Testament book study and cruise through the book of Ruth (and in one class period no less! Not bad considering Acts took the better part of a year). But considering the next two lessons in our major study are both on adultery and sexual sin (Matt. 5:27-30 dealing with lust on Oct. 21 and 5:31-32 with divorce on Oct. 28) it seemed like it might not be too bad an idea to look at romance done right. And that "no OT book study" thing had been bugging me for a while so Ruth seemed a logical choice. So basically having read the whole story from the book, here's what we found out about what it takes to have a godly romance:
1. Godly romances come about from imperfect situations with imperfect people. (1:1-5)
This is an encouragement to me personally. My family situation and history are far from perfect and the mistakes I've made along the way regarding romance are legion (and, in some cases, legend). Many of you could probably say the same thing. But if it took perfect people and perfect situations to make godly romances none of us would even know there was such a thing. Because none of us is perfect. This should be an encouragement to you as well.
In the Scripture passage, Elimelech made a bad decision for his family. He left the promised land because of a famine. The Bible even tells us he was from Bethlehem, which means "House of Bread," a place where one ought to be able to find prosperity if ever there were one. And yet, he took the same path that led the patriarchs into slavery so long ago and went to a foreign land populated by a very pagan people to find food. Instead, he found death for himself, Moabitess wives for his two sons (something that is pretty clearly prohibited in Scripture--a Moabite could not even enter the assembly of Israel; Deut. 23:3) and ultimately, his sons' deaths as well, leaving his widow Naomi alone with her daughters-in-law. Doesn't really look like the picture of godly romance, let alone godly anything, does it? And you know what? It actually gets worse. Not only does godly romance involve imperfect people and situations but...
2. Godly romance involves a need. (1:6-13)
We'll develop this idea a little bit more in the weeks to come but there seems to me to be a pretty clear biblical notion that those whom God has called to marry are people who truly need a spouse in order to see His purposes accomplished in their lives. Paul says avoiding immorality is one reason for this (1 C0r. 7:1-9) and Jesus makes it clear that not everyone can actually be single and live up to God's calling for their lives (Matt. 19:11). So, for those who struggle with immorality and to whom it has not been given to be single, marriage is the norm. In fact, marriage appears first in the book of Genesis as a means of accomplishing God's first command to mankind: "Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth and subdue it; and rule..." (Gen. 1:28). This explains why God doesn't think that it's a good thing for Adam to be alone and makes Eve his wife as a "helper suitable to him" (Gen. 2:18). Only through their marriage could God's purpose be accomplished in them.
In Ruth, the need is more immediate and personal. Naomi has no sons to support her in her old age and Orpah and Ruth have no husbands. In that day, not many women had trades so the women faced the very real possibility of not surviving the death of their husbands and sons. No wonder when Naomi returns home to Bethlehem she tells her friends not to call her "Naomi" meaning "pleasant" but "Mara" meaning "bitter" (1:20).
The system of levirite marriage in the Old Testament allowed for the brother of an Israelite who died and left a childless widow to marry the widow and raise up children who would be counted as his brother's. In this way, the inheritance of the tribes of Israel would be secure and none of the tribes or families would be lost (in Judges 20-21 a civil war almost destroys the tribe of Benjamin and it is considered a terrible tragedy, for example). But Naomi had no more sons to give Orpah and Ruth and no husband to even produce any more sons. So she tried to send them away(1:8-13) . Orpah was not happy about it but she obeyed (1:14). But Ruth saw beyond the needs of imperfect people to something greater...
3. Godly romance requires faithful devotion to God. (1:15-18)
Ruth 1:16b gets read at weddings a lot: "Wherever you go, I will go; And wherever you lodge I will lodge; Your people shall be my people, And your God, my God." And with good reason. Just as Ruth's devotion to Naomi meant she would share in all that belonged to her mother-in-law, the good and the bad, so too do a husband and wife make such a commitment "for better or for worse."
But what caused Ruth to be so devoted to Naomi? Well, admittedly the text doesn't say for sure but I think we can find a clue in her devotion to Naomi's God expressed above. No doubt both Orpah and Ruth had started worshipping Yahweh the true God instead of the pagan gods of the Moabites when they married Mahlon and Chilion but Orpah could still turn back to her old lifestyle of pagan worship (1:15). Ruth could not. She had nothing to gain from staying with Naomi but something was different about Ruth that made her want to be with her mother-in-law and be among the people of God. I believe that the only good explanation can be that in her dealings with these worshippers of the one true God, Ruth had entered into a true saving relationship with Him. It changed who she was and left her with no choice but to see her relationship with Naomi through to whatever end. Her character is clearly that of a child of God. In fact, that's the next point on godly romance. But for that, sadly, you'll have to wait until the next installment...
Come back and read the rest soon! And join us Sunday for more on God's view of romance, marriage and sex. We really can do it right and see His blessing on our marriages. And, as we found out in Ruth, God can do more with marriages founded on Him than we could possibly ever imagine.
Love ya!
Barry
1. Godly romances come about from imperfect situations with imperfect people. (1:1-5)
This is an encouragement to me personally. My family situation and history are far from perfect and the mistakes I've made along the way regarding romance are legion (and, in some cases, legend). Many of you could probably say the same thing. But if it took perfect people and perfect situations to make godly romances none of us would even know there was such a thing. Because none of us is perfect. This should be an encouragement to you as well.
In the Scripture passage, Elimelech made a bad decision for his family. He left the promised land because of a famine. The Bible even tells us he was from Bethlehem, which means "House of Bread," a place where one ought to be able to find prosperity if ever there were one. And yet, he took the same path that led the patriarchs into slavery so long ago and went to a foreign land populated by a very pagan people to find food. Instead, he found death for himself, Moabitess wives for his two sons (something that is pretty clearly prohibited in Scripture--a Moabite could not even enter the assembly of Israel; Deut. 23:3) and ultimately, his sons' deaths as well, leaving his widow Naomi alone with her daughters-in-law. Doesn't really look like the picture of godly romance, let alone godly anything, does it? And you know what? It actually gets worse. Not only does godly romance involve imperfect people and situations but...
2. Godly romance involves a need. (1:6-13)
We'll develop this idea a little bit more in the weeks to come but there seems to me to be a pretty clear biblical notion that those whom God has called to marry are people who truly need a spouse in order to see His purposes accomplished in their lives. Paul says avoiding immorality is one reason for this (1 C0r. 7:1-9) and Jesus makes it clear that not everyone can actually be single and live up to God's calling for their lives (Matt. 19:11). So, for those who struggle with immorality and to whom it has not been given to be single, marriage is the norm. In fact, marriage appears first in the book of Genesis as a means of accomplishing God's first command to mankind: "Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth and subdue it; and rule..." (Gen. 1:28). This explains why God doesn't think that it's a good thing for Adam to be alone and makes Eve his wife as a "helper suitable to him" (Gen. 2:18). Only through their marriage could God's purpose be accomplished in them.
In Ruth, the need is more immediate and personal. Naomi has no sons to support her in her old age and Orpah and Ruth have no husbands. In that day, not many women had trades so the women faced the very real possibility of not surviving the death of their husbands and sons. No wonder when Naomi returns home to Bethlehem she tells her friends not to call her "Naomi" meaning "pleasant" but "Mara" meaning "bitter" (1:20).
The system of levirite marriage in the Old Testament allowed for the brother of an Israelite who died and left a childless widow to marry the widow and raise up children who would be counted as his brother's. In this way, the inheritance of the tribes of Israel would be secure and none of the tribes or families would be lost (in Judges 20-21 a civil war almost destroys the tribe of Benjamin and it is considered a terrible tragedy, for example). But Naomi had no more sons to give Orpah and Ruth and no husband to even produce any more sons. So she tried to send them away(1:8-13) . Orpah was not happy about it but she obeyed (1:14). But Ruth saw beyond the needs of imperfect people to something greater...
3. Godly romance requires faithful devotion to God. (1:15-18)
Ruth 1:16b gets read at weddings a lot: "Wherever you go, I will go; And wherever you lodge I will lodge; Your people shall be my people, And your God, my God." And with good reason. Just as Ruth's devotion to Naomi meant she would share in all that belonged to her mother-in-law, the good and the bad, so too do a husband and wife make such a commitment "for better or for worse."
But what caused Ruth to be so devoted to Naomi? Well, admittedly the text doesn't say for sure but I think we can find a clue in her devotion to Naomi's God expressed above. No doubt both Orpah and Ruth had started worshipping Yahweh the true God instead of the pagan gods of the Moabites when they married Mahlon and Chilion but Orpah could still turn back to her old lifestyle of pagan worship (1:15). Ruth could not. She had nothing to gain from staying with Naomi but something was different about Ruth that made her want to be with her mother-in-law and be among the people of God. I believe that the only good explanation can be that in her dealings with these worshippers of the one true God, Ruth had entered into a true saving relationship with Him. It changed who she was and left her with no choice but to see her relationship with Naomi through to whatever end. Her character is clearly that of a child of God. In fact, that's the next point on godly romance. But for that, sadly, you'll have to wait until the next installment...
Come back and read the rest soon! And join us Sunday for more on God's view of romance, marriage and sex. We really can do it right and see His blessing on our marriages. And, as we found out in Ruth, God can do more with marriages founded on Him than we could possibly ever imagine.
Love ya!
Barry
Monday, October 15, 2007
Another Fair Trip
Blogging by copy and paste again but don't worry. Some actually new content is coming soon. For now...
Well, a lot of folks weren't able to make it to the fair on Saturday. We really hate that we missed you but we still had a lot of fun. Now you may be thinking that the fun is over but...
THINK AGAIN!
(oo, dramatic...)
We're going back to the fair Sunday, October 21, 2007! Not only that, but I've still got 32 ride tickets left from the first trip so we're riding some rides! And we might even smell some livestock (in fact I almost guarantee it)! What's not to love?
So here are the stats:
WHAT: DMs at the State Fair! (Round 2)
WHERE: Meet at the Brick House at Faith, head out to the Fairgrounds from there.
WHEN: Sometime after class on Sunday, Oct. 21, 2007. We may leave as early as 1pm if everyone is ready to go or we can meet back after everybody gets changed and leave around 2 or so. Flexibility is a key ingredient to the schedule here.
HOW MUCH: Gate tickets are $7 and ride tickets are $1 a piece and come individually or in books of 20. Most rides cost about 4-5 tickets to enjoy. Also, you want to bring money for that great fair food (and I still didn't get a fried Twinkee yet this year)! Everything is a little more than it would be in the real world but you can certainly have a "fair-ly" (*GROAN*) good time without spending all that much.
Well that's the score on Fair Trip 2! Hope to see you all at the Brick House this Sunday afternoon (and, you know, before that for Sunday school too)!
Love to all,
Barry
Well, a lot of folks weren't able to make it to the fair on Saturday. We really hate that we missed you but we still had a lot of fun. Now you may be thinking that the fun is over but...
THINK AGAIN!
(oo, dramatic...)
We're going back to the fair Sunday, October 21, 2007! Not only that, but I've still got 32 ride tickets left from the first trip so we're riding some rides! And we might even smell some livestock (in fact I almost guarantee it)! What's not to love?
So here are the stats:
WHAT: DMs at the State Fair! (Round 2)
WHERE: Meet at the Brick House at Faith, head out to the Fairgrounds from there.
WHEN: Sometime after class on Sunday, Oct. 21, 2007. We may leave as early as 1pm if everyone is ready to go or we can meet back after everybody gets changed and leave around 2 or so. Flexibility is a key ingredient to the schedule here.
HOW MUCH: Gate tickets are $7 and ride tickets are $1 a piece and come individually or in books of 20. Most rides cost about 4-5 tickets to enjoy. Also, you want to bring money for that great fair food (and I still didn't get a fried Twinkee yet this year)! Everything is a little more than it would be in the real world but you can certainly have a "fair-ly" (*GROAN*) good time without spending all that much.
Well that's the score on Fair Trip 2! Hope to see you all at the Brick House this Sunday afternoon (and, you know, before that for Sunday school too)!
Love to all,
Barry
Monday, October 8, 2007
Let's all go to the Fair!
Welcome to the brand-spanking-new DM blog! First up, a little info on the State Fair trip this Saturday:
What?---> DMs at the NC STATE FAIR! (pretty self explanatory)
When?---> Saturday, October 13, 2007, 9:00 (or so) am. If necessary, we can push the time back (the group can decide on Sunday) or have a second (and maybe even a third) meeting time for people who can't get there that early to head out later. Or just come on to the fair and call me on my cell phone (919-618-5198) and we'll see if we can meet you somewhere on the fairgrounds when you get there. We can leave for home whenever people are ready to go (or out of cash :-) ).
Where?---> Meet at the Brick House, then carpool to the State Fairgrounds in Raleigh (we can park near the football stadium across the street).
How much?---> Tickets to get into the fair are $7 at the gate BUT if you order online, they're only $5! ( http://www.ncstatefair.org/2007a/Tickets/index.htm ). Ride tickets are $1 a piece but at the same link above, you can buy a book of 18 for $10 and save 8 bucks! Of course, you will need money for shopping, food, games and shows so I'd bring at least $15-$20 more (and even more if you plan on playing lots of games or buying much). If the money's a problem but you really want to go, let me know and we'll work something out. NOTE: Online Fair tickets must be purchased before Oct. 11 to get the deals for game or entrance tickets.
Hey, I hope everyone can make it out. It's going to be a lot of fun! And just in case you don't know, I love every last one of you guys more than I can say! It's such an honor to teach/lead a group like this and I don't take it lightly. I pray God blesses each of you richly with an abundance of Elephant Ears and Fried Twinkees--but with none of the malnutritious effects thereof! :-)
If you can RSVP and let Katie Brandenburg, Reid or me know you're coming and when, that'll help so we'll know to wait for you before we leave for the fair. Either email one of us back or RSVP at the Facebook event page. Thanks! Much love and big smiles!
What?---> DMs at the NC STATE FAIR! (pretty self explanatory)
When?---> Saturday, October 13, 2007, 9:00 (or so) am. If necessary, we can push the time back (the group can decide on Sunday) or have a second (and maybe even a third) meeting time for people who can't get there that early to head out later. Or just come on to the fair and call me on my cell phone (919-618-5198) and we'll see if we can meet you somewhere on the fairgrounds when you get there. We can leave for home whenever people are ready to go (or out of cash :-) ).
Where?---> Meet at the Brick House, then carpool to the State Fairgrounds in Raleigh (we can park near the football stadium across the street).
How much?---> Tickets to get into the fair are $7 at the gate BUT if you order online, they're only $5! ( http://www.ncstatefair.org/2007a/Tickets/index.htm ). Ride tickets are $1 a piece but at the same link above, you can buy a book of 18 for $10 and save 8 bucks! Of course, you will need money for shopping, food, games and shows so I'd bring at least $15-$20 more (and even more if you plan on playing lots of games or buying much). If the money's a problem but you really want to go, let me know and we'll work something out. NOTE: Online Fair tickets must be purchased before Oct. 11 to get the deals for game or entrance tickets.
Hey, I hope everyone can make it out. It's going to be a lot of fun! And just in case you don't know, I love every last one of you guys more than I can say! It's such an honor to teach/lead a group like this and I don't take it lightly. I pray God blesses each of you richly with an abundance of Elephant Ears and Fried Twinkees--but with none of the malnutritious effects thereof! :-)
If you can RSVP and let Katie Brandenburg, Reid or me know you're coming and when, that'll help so we'll know to wait for you before we leave for the fair. Either email one of us back or RSVP at the Facebook event page. Thanks! Much love and big smiles!
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